Self-deception
“Self-deception is, by its very nature, the most elusive of mental facts. We do not see what it is that we do not see!

“Self-deception operates both at the level of the individual mind, & in the collective awareness of the group. To belong to a group of any sort, the tacit price of membership is to agree not to notice one’s own feelings of uneasiness & misgiving, & certainly not to question anything that challenges the group’s way of doing things. The price for the group in this arrangement is that dissent, even healthy dissent, is stifled!

“In order to break through the cocoons of silence that keep vital truths from the collective awareness you need courage. It is the courage to seek the truth & to speak it that can save us from the narcotic of self-deception.

“It is a paradox of our time that those with power are too comfortable to notice the pain of those who suffer, & those who suffer have no power.

“To break out of this trap requires the courage to speak truth to power!”  ~ Daniel Goleman

He goes on to explain:
“My thesis, in sum, revolves around these premises:
1) The mind can protect itself against anxiety by dimming awareness.
2) This mechanism creates a blind spot: a zone of blocked attention and self-deception.
3) Such blind spots occur at each major level of behavior from the psychological to the social.”

One thing he discusses is how our brain is like a filter. Any information that fits into our preconceived vision of the world is allowed to pass. The rest is subconsciously deleted from our awareness in order to avoid the anxiety of dealing with the dissonance.

In effect we trade truth for security!  Authenticity for perceived happiness!

We are creative powers and no outside circumstances can define us as long as we believe this to be true!  


Todd Sylvester
Have a Drug Free Day

If you don’t think you deserve a better LIFE, a successful family, how can you achieve it? How can you reach something if you don’t feel you can have it? If I don’t believe in myself, then it’s not likely that I’ll attract the means necessary to make this it a reality. It’s also not likely that I’ll be successful if I don’t believe it’s possible.

 What steps are you taking to make better things happen in your life?

1. You must have a “Growth Mindset.”  Believing you are something special is a Trap.  “The moment we believe that success is determine by an ingrained level of ability, we will be brittle in the face of
adversity.”  Write down your ideas/goals for the future. If you are going to be sober the rest of your life, what steps do I need to take?  Are you willing to stand alone in order to be clean?

2. Look at where you are now. Write down the things you’ll need to move forward. 
 
3. Consider your everyday thoughts. Do you go from believing you can reach your goals to being
discouraged? If you are always thinking negative thoughts how can you create a positive life for yourself? What you tell yourself everyday does have an impact on what happens in your life.

4.  Be willing to make mistakes, be willing to be honest with others and yourself, but most of all Try! 
This is a “Growth Mindset.”

 If you want to make positive and powerful changes, then you have to believe that those changes are possible for you. You have to be there on the inside long before you see the outside results.

Dear Friends,

Something that changed my life a long time ago and a phrase I just heard reminding me of how important it is to love yourself.  "Love of Self may prove to be the most powerful antidote to addiction and unwanted behaviors!"  Wow, that is a bold statement and it's a statement that I found to be true in my recovery. 

I learned a long time ago in my recovery how important it is for me to take care of my mind and body, particularly my mind.  The way I thinking about me, my surroundings, friends, family, etc. was not the way to feel true happiness or leading to good things happening in my life.  When I was an addict and not in recovery I did not realize what I was really doing to myself, specifically the way I would talk to myself.  I was constantly speaking to myself in a hateful way: I'm no good, I hate life, I will never be successful, I've let everybody down, no one likes me, etc.  This type of thinking became a habit.  I tell the kids I work with all the time how drugs fool your brain into thinking what you are doing is the greatest thing in the world but in reality it was the tool I was using to destroy myself.  I did not realize it then but now I realize the damage I was doing. 

I learned a tool a long time ago that helped me break that habit and has brought the light, so to speak, back into my mind and life.  It has giving me a way to overcome the negative, hateful self-talk that was holding me back.  The tool is called Metal Simulation, a way to help change the unhealthy circuitry in my  brain to a healthy and powerful circuity.  You see, every time you have a thought your brain releases chemicals and an electrical transmission is triggered in your brain.  If your thoughts are negative, it releases negative chemicals.  When this happens you start to feel bad about you, your life, and your world.  You slump in your walk, your negative with your talk with others, and for me, this would cause me to use the one thing that made me feel better - drugs.  It was a vicious cycle! It was difficult to deal with, even when I was finally off drugs and in recovery.  To this day I use this tool but I now call it Power-Talk.  It takes only 10 minutes to do it and it has opened up a world of opportunity, joy, and confidence that I did not know existed until I started using this.  The Power-Talk exercise link is on the "Programs" page of this website. 

Taking care of my physical body, as well, has proven to be a self-esteem builder in my life.  Scientists in just the past few months have discovered that exercise appears to build a brain that resists physical shrinkage and enhance cognitive flexibility. Exercise, the latest neuroscience suggests, does more to bolster thinking than thinking does.  Source: "How Exercise Could Lead to a Better Brain", By GRETCHEN REYNOLDS Published: April 18, 2012. New York Times

A daily workout along with Power-Talk Exercise has given me, confidence in myself and in my abilities, the courage to look in the mirror and tell myself I am going to have another drug free day, the confidence to reach out and to help other people, and has given me the strength to face life challenges in a healthier way! 

I hope this helps to anyone suffering from consistent negative thinking and I would love to hear what you think : )  

Until Next Time,
Sly Dog