Self-deception
“Self-deception is, by its very nature, the most elusive of mental facts. We do not see what it is that we do not see!

“Self-deception operates both at the level of the individual mind, & in the collective awareness of the group. To belong to a group of any sort, the tacit price of membership is to agree not to notice one’s own feelings of uneasiness & misgiving, & certainly not to question anything that challenges the group’s way of doing things. The price for the group in this arrangement is that dissent, even healthy dissent, is stifled!

“In order to break through the cocoons of silence that keep vital truths from the collective awareness you need courage. It is the courage to seek the truth & to speak it that can save us from the narcotic of self-deception.

“It is a paradox of our time that those with power are too comfortable to notice the pain of those who suffer, & those who suffer have no power.

“To break out of this trap requires the courage to speak truth to power!”  ~ Daniel Goleman

He goes on to explain:
“My thesis, in sum, revolves around these premises:
1) The mind can protect itself against anxiety by dimming awareness.
2) This mechanism creates a blind spot: a zone of blocked attention and self-deception.
3) Such blind spots occur at each major level of behavior from the psychological to the social.”

One thing he discusses is how our brain is like a filter. Any information that fits into our preconceived vision of the world is allowed to pass. The rest is subconsciously deleted from our awareness in order to avoid the anxiety of dealing with the dissonance.

In effect we trade truth for security!  Authenticity for perceived happiness!

We are creative powers and no outside circumstances can define us as long as we believe this to be true!  


Todd Sylvester
Have a Drug Free Day

I have found that Gratitude is one of the most powerful antidotes to unwanted behaviors and the key to opening the door to more blessings in your life.  I wake each day with an attitude of gratitude for being sober.  Being sober has brought me so many blessings, so many that would not have come any other way.  "Throw your heart over the fence to sobriety and the rest will follow."  

I came across this great article that can help with cultivating an attitude of gratitude...

"If I could offer you a magic potion that would make you happier, healthier, more optimistic and more productive, and tell you that potion would cost nothing and will require very little effort to use, would you be interested?

Let me ask the question differently.

If this potion existed would you want some?

Of course you would! Unfortunately, I don't have a potion that will do these things. But each of us has something even better than a potion that will do all of those things and more...

Gratitude.

Science tells us that an "attitude of gratitude" is a good health choice. Being more grateful more often makes us happier and more optimistic. But gratitude also adds to the bottom line - in very real ways. And the best news about gratitude is that it requires little time and no money.

Here are five reasons gratitude improves your productivity and results:

Gratitude attracts what we want. The universal law of attraction says that we will attract into our life the things we think about and focus on. Since this is true, wouldn't you want more of what you are thankful for? (I think I know the answer to that!) Remember that when you are consciously aware of your blessings, and are grateful for them, you are focusing more clearly on what you do want in your life - and are attracting more of those things into your life.

Gratitude improves relationships. We learn the importance of saying "thank you" as little children. We are taught that habit because it is "good manners." This childhood lesson is extremely powerful. Think about those people that you know who are most appreciative of you - and let you know it. How do you feel about them? Does their appreciation positively impact your relationship with them? Of course it does! Be grateful for people, their contributions, their talents and their actions - and make sure you let them know how you feel.

Gratitude reduces negativity. It is hard to be negative about your situation when you are thinking about things for which you are grateful. One of the fastest ways to improve your mood or outlook is to count your blessings.

Gratitude improves problem solving skills. Too often we look at problem solving with a very jaded view. "Something is wrong. We have barriers in our way. Then, we have to put in effort to fix it." Conversely, when we think about what we are grateful for we open our minds up to new possibilities and connections. We also enter a problem solving situation with a perspective of improvement and opportunity rather than challenge or issue.

Gratitude helps us learn. Every dark cloud has a silver lining. Behind every problem lies an opportunity. Being grateful for our situation - even if we don't like everything about it - allows us to be thankful for the opportunity to learn something new.

That's Fine, But How?

At this point you may be thinking, OK, sounds great, but how can I really be more grateful, more often?

It's really very easy.

Let's practice right now.

1. Make a list of five things you are grateful for right now. These can be big things (like your family) or little things (like the fact that someone held the door open for you this morning). This can be a mental list or written down. Do it now.

2. Reflect on your list and allow yourself to feel good about these things.

3. If there is a person you can thank or show your appreciation to, do that now too (a quick call or email is a good start!).

You can do this exercise anytime, and you don't have to stop at five things. In fact, it is a great idea to keep a running list in your Journal, planner or notebook - this way you can return to your list anytime you wish, reinforcing your gratitude.

But at any moment you can make a list, bask in those thoughts, and share that thankfulness with others.

You've probably thought of being thankful as a good thing to do or the right thing to do. But now hopefully you see it can be even more powerful than "right."

Gratitude is an attitude. Gratitude is a choice. And gratitude is a habit. When we consciously practice being grateful for the people, situations and resources around us we begin to attract better relationships and results. The habit will be strengthened as you make the choice each day." 
By Kevin Eikenberry

Have a grateful day today!

BY SHANNON KAISER  
While cruising in Hawaii with Wailua River guides, I asked my kayak guide, Annie, what her favorite part about living in Kauai was.

She smiled brightly and beamed, "I'm so rich here. I mean, I don't have a lot of money, but my quality of life is abundant. I get to do what I love every day, and that makes me rich.”

Living a life you love is possible for everyone. My conversation with the happiest kayak girl in the world stirred up ideas of other happy people who practice happiness. People who have made happiness a habit and it beams from their pores. Because happiness is a choice and we can all cultivate it.

But the happiest people in the world have some habits they never talk about. When you live and breathe happiness, you feel more connected to your life. More grounded and purposeful. Here are seven habits happy people have but don’t talk about.

1. They put themselves first.

They know self-love isn't selfish. Happy people put their needs first because they see the power of showing up fully for others. When you take care of yourself, you help everyone else. If you sacrifice your needs in order to help others, you're only showing up as half of yourself.

2. They embrace impermanence.

People who feel at peace with their life recognize everything has a time and place. Relationships, jobs and experiences are all part of a bigger plan. Happy people recognize life is a balancing act between holding on and letting go — and they're comfortable releasing things that no longer serve them.

3. They're unapologetic about their desires.

Some may call them selfish, crazy, even ridiculous, but happy people make their dreams come true and focus on their goals with fearless force. They often manifest what they desire fast. Because they believe in their dreams. They live life to the beat of their own drum and will follow their heart with courageous energy. You can’t stop a happy person from reaching his or her goals. They know life is short and not following through would feel like premature death.

4. They don’t worry about money.

Happy people are extremely generous. They know the more they give, the more they get in return. But they don’t give expecting anything in return. This energy creates an abundant mindset that brings more wealth to them.

Happy people have a healthy relationship with money and they have learned it is connected to their self-worth. The more they value themselves, the more money they attract. Instead of worrying about money, they take steps to make more money and create more flow. This often happens because they do what they love daily, which creates a rich, deep connection to their own life. They also realize we don’t need a lot of money to be happy. It's experience that makes life worthwhile.

5. They don't need you to like them.

The happiest people I know don't care what others say or think about them. The only thing that matters is that they like themselves. This self-confident, infectious energy often attracts a lot of people. Happy people often have good friends. But happy folks are not dependent on your liking them.

6. They know rejection is protection.

Happy people don’t take rejection personally. They know in the big scheme of things, life will always give them what they really need. So the guy who didn’t call back, the potential job that didn’t pan out, or the loan rejection letter are all universal signs that it wasn’t the best fit. Trust that something better is on its way.

7. They see everyone as equal.

The happiest people see no difference between anyone and any situation. They don’t judge, condemn or point out flaws in others. They won’t try to prove you wrong. They embrace all of life’s diversity and celebrate the contrasts.